What Do Women Really Want . . .

Young King Arthur was ambushed and imprisoned by

the monarch of a neighboring kingdom. The monarch could have killed him, but was

moved by Arthur's youthful happiness. So he offered him freedom, as long as he

could answer a very difficult question. Arthur would have a year to figure out

the answer; if, after a year, he still had no answer, he would be killed. The

question was: What do women really want? Such a question would perplex even the

most knowledgeable man, and, to young Arthur, it seemed an impossible query.

Well, since it was better than death, he accepted the monarch's proposition to

have an answer by year's end.

He returned to his kingdom and began to poll

everybody: the princess, the prostitutes, the priests, the wise men, the court

jester. In all, he spoke with everyone but no one could give him a satisfactory

answer. What most people did tell him was to consult the old witch, as only she

would know the answer. The price would be high, since the witch was famous

throughout the kingdom for the exorbitant prices she charged.

The last day of the year arrived and Arthur had

no alternative but to talk to the witch. She agreed to answer his question, but

he'd have to accept her price first: The old witch wanted to marry Gawain, the

most noble of the Knights of the Round Table and Arthur's closest friend! Young

Arthur was horrified: she was hunchbacked and awfully hideous, had only one

tooth, smelled like sewage water, often made obscene noises... He had never run

across such a repugnant creature. He refused to force his friend to marry her

and have to endure such a burden.

Gawain, upon learning of the proposal, spoke with

Arthur. He told him that nothing was too big of a sacrifice compared to Arthur's

life and the preservation of the Round Table. Hence, their wedding was

proclaimed, and the witch answered Arthur's question:
What a woman really

wants is to be able to be in charge of her own life. Everyone instantly knew

that the witch had uttered a great truth and that Arthur's life would be
spared.

And so it went. The neighboring monarch spared

Arthur's life and granted him total freedom. What a wedding Gawain and the witch

had! Arthur was torn between relief and anguish. Gawain was proper as always,

gentle and courteous. The old witch put her worst manners on display. She ate

with her hands, belched and farted, and made everyone uncomfortable.

The

wedding night approached: Gawain, steeling himself for a horrific night, entered

the bedroom. What a sight awaited! The most beautiful woman he'd ever seen lay

before him! Gawain was astounded and asked what had happened. The beauty replied

that since he had been so kind to her (when she'd been a witch), half the time

she would be her horrible, deformed self, and the other half, she would be her

beautiful maiden self. Which would he want her to be during the day and which

during the night? What a cruel question? Gawain began to think of his

predicament: During the day a beautiful woman to show off to his friend, but at

night, in the privacy of his home, an old spooky witch? Or would he prefer

having by day a hideous witch, but by night a beautiful woman to enjoy many

intimate moments? What would you do?
What Gawain chose follows below, but

don't read until you've made your own choice.

Noble Gawain replied that he would let her

choose for herself. Upon hearing this, she announced that she would be beautiful

all the time, because he had respected her and had let her be in charge of her

own life . . .